On Saturday night (4/7), kami keluar dgn zarina ke SUnway ,EUPHORIA MOS club,. MUla2nya planning to go to HArdRock KL again but when all discussed and LIly pun agree if pigi dekat2..like in Damansara, The Curve ka ..exp-THe Santuary or The Scarlet, maybe dia bole lagi ikut. BUt suddenly. dia call...dia ckp can't follow bcoz Husband dia sudah balik rumah. So Zaza Make a new plan tog o somewhere new la. It's a new club that we never visited & it was kinda' awkward event too la..bcoz..of some unexpected event happened. We having alot of fun and drunk fwe times of ABSOLUE VODKA BLUE which we shared among 4 person-Mickey,KS( Zaza's best friends) Me, & Cilla.. but Zaza didin't drink alchohol at all la..! She always being the innocent one in our group and I'm so glad she being able to make herself feel comfortable with us that time eventhou ..we are all so much call drunk at the end of the party.
I was having greAT DAY..I thoughts..but ..when during the end of it, when after this CHInese guy( dun know who..keep hugging and 'tarik2' me..that time) companion was over, I begin to cry..and I don't know why...BUt I CRIED! I laugh at the moment and dance alot that night until the early morning but I cried...at the end of the 'show'...I can't believe I cried.
I did feel satisfied when dance and dance all night long that time, having the Absolute Vodka for the last glass- it's too much of alchohol without enough 'mixer' (Sprint la...that time..)so, the drink kind of more 'kick' than the 1st time we drink it.
Suddenly..after that long ...Music for end of the day..just for fwe of us left that time at the dance floor, when I stop playing around with them...and tired of dancing, My tears ..begun to drop bit by bit, and it's started to 'rain' . I sit down at one of the sofa beside the dance floor & I drop my upper body to my knee and sooner ..I know the cry become more worst! I heard Zaza said, "Org Mabuk Selalunya akan Nangis ker', she asked either Cilla or Mickey that time and it kind of making my tears become more...out. I swipe it over and over, but it can't stop ending.
When I realised, my heart bcome so much in pain that time, I let my innersense control my body and my mind..I wanted to cry actually since before and I needed to cry bcoz to tell the truth, I was sad..I never stop thinking even a minute for all that happened. It all happened.. in few minutes, either it bcoz of my own family problems, financial, work or bcoz of friends.....
I know all the while I have problems..and the current one had making me feel more sad.
Nangis...Sampai time tu, I DRUNK! I never drunk like that time before in life when went to any club. I did knew I laugh , I have fun and great enjoyment but I never think I will get drunk & at the same time I crying..
Now i know..that when you are drunk, ppl said it will making you letting out all those feeling you have before from deep deep inside in the heart. Maybe that time, I feel for all the problems- by all these Friendship things, the words from Rizal's email, The friendship betwn 3 of them, my family, my works, my financial , my own life....
I feel it's still not complete yet. I feel if in unsettle place.
I dun want Zaza to think alot about all these that happened, I don't want her to feel worst for everyday of her life for thinking of what happened now. With all the 'broken frienship' that had been goin on around here..with the dwen,Rizal & Linda problems..it's just not worth for he to think about it,coz i know she need to concentrate on her life, works & her BJ class..,
i knew from her sour face, I knew she feel the same way like Me & cilla felt- felt so sad, so tense & so..in dilemma from our own's friends betrayal.
As friend, I want to help even I know I can't help myself. I dun want her to stay 'away' frm us bcoz..it's pity to know..that the one friend that left in that grouup-ZAZA had also fade away.
It's kind of hurt if it does happen! Can't accept it anymore if it's yet to come..
MY tired & 'Red' face was around the 'uploaded photo' in FB for the event in EUPHORIA. Can see my teary eyes at the end of the photo and I have to put those 'fact' smile to cover my sour ^ red faces. I 'm really glad that these friends was there for me that time- when I cried,..when i was sad, when i was feeling down!, When the other friends enjoying their fullfil time together& spending their quality time..I do wish the BEST FOR THEM coz..now , i know...when you sad and if you found out there's a friend who can stand by you at your side, then ..youu'll be glad to know that GOD had send his 'ANgel' to comfort you..And i know..I have that friends in my life before & i still see few of them in my life NOW~Thank TO GOD, He send me.. such nice friends in this world to make me feel motivated. I'm glad..
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