Noo..i didn't! yups...i still didn't know what I want to decide these few days. I do think that it's my time to let things go and move on with my new life ..soon in KK..but do I really care to go back for good?
I did make up my mind about really turning myself to surrender all the things at KL and to start a new life in KK. Ireally hope things will be better then at KK then here in KL..cos honestly, i'm so...missing KK SAbah alot despite all the heart broken tragedy i was in with some of the SAbahan dudes.
I just hope they know it someday..i hope i didnt have to face the hurtful things ever again in future cos now...i'm trying to forget it all. and love my family and friends more than I love those people whose trying to kill my heart away...
OOh..God, help me in this....
I think it's really the time for me ...to move forward...
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Saturday, July 17, 2010
Stay with me...
dear blog,
how to say this?i can't say it again and again ncos i think it's more better for it to end but ..deep down, i feel that if only i can be patience and try to tolerate more...and be normal for him then maybe our life could be better. ( i guess) but...
i feel that it's way too far from being ok. So,I surrenderred. i know its not worth to fight for again even i know only him can take my weaknesses as a normal thg..and accept who i am frm the 1st point of view..but i guess it again, he feel like he 'surrender' from having anythgs for me anymore. not even a 'goodbye'or courage to face me with words that it's for the end, eventhou i knew i ended it. but shudn't we suppose to have a good conversation? a mature mind to think and day
DO u know how hard for him to stop his way of thinking abt me, when the 1st time i knew why he tried to ignore me!...im clueless at that point somehow, i do feel why in a sudden that i have to be patiencne and hapy to have a happy and satisfied..
AM i different from any girls?ladies??
i hope i m can go to some 'mystic place' where i shud let myself be so busy and forget abt the past.
The past experiencens like ...eating me alive..!!Maybe friend said it true, or maybe ...i'm eaating the innocent out from me.and begin to build somethgs more bad , naughty.mmm..yeah..i guess.. sometimes, not all really understand what im saying..(~_ ~)
how to say this?i can't say it again and again ncos i think it's more better for it to end but ..deep down, i feel that if only i can be patience and try to tolerate more...and be normal for him then maybe our life could be better. ( i guess) but...
i feel that it's way too far from being ok. So,I surrenderred. i know its not worth to fight for again even i know only him can take my weaknesses as a normal thg..and accept who i am frm the 1st point of view..but i guess it again, he feel like he 'surrender' from having anythgs for me anymore. not even a 'goodbye'or courage to face me with words that it's for the end, eventhou i knew i ended it. but shudn't we suppose to have a good conversation? a mature mind to think and day
DO u know how hard for him to stop his way of thinking abt me, when the 1st time i knew why he tried to ignore me!...im clueless at that point somehow, i do feel why in a sudden that i have to be patiencne and hapy to have a happy and satisfied..
AM i different from any girls?ladies??
i hope i m can go to some 'mystic place' where i shud let myself be so busy and forget abt the past.
The past experiencens like ...eating me alive..!!Maybe friend said it true, or maybe ...i'm eaating the innocent out from me.and begin to build somethgs more bad , naughty.mmm..yeah..i guess.. sometimes, not all really understand what im saying..(~_ ~)
My Heart Paramore Lyrics
i listened to the lyric are like remind me of ME...remind me of how I been react now..hoping for some miracle ...that can bring me to something 'happy' but i know, it's over..really like over..when, the most trusted and responsible..person also can break us down.
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